First Major Setback

So, before I got pregnant, I was wearing size 10 pants/shorts/skirts/dresses, etc. and medium shirts. Now, that I'm post pregnancy, I still fit into my size 10 pregnancy bottoms (and really, that's not saying much), but I have to wear large shirts now. I'm hoping once I finish breast-feeding and lose a little more weight that won't be an issue anymore. But the worst part of all isn't the top at all ... it's the bottom. I have tried on my favorite size 10 GAP jeans ... I can pull them up and button them. They are snug around the legs and tight around my belly/hips. I am working out trying to fit into those jeans. I also have a pair of shorts that are size 10 (GAP), and those fit much like the jeans ... snug where they didn't use to be snug, but overall, they button and zip. So, I bought a pair of jean shorts on gap.com that are a size 12, because I thought I should have something that I can wear as I lose the weight. They arrived ... and they don't fit at all ... in fact, they fit WORSE than my size 10 stuff that I already own! So, I went to the GAP to see what I could possibly find. Maybe it was the "cut" I thought ... or something, but it just couldn't be that I was THAT big. Well, turns out ... I am THAT big. I fit into the size 14 shorts. I just can't do it. I won't do it. I will not buy a pair of anything in a size 14. I left that size in college, and I won't go back. When I said goodbye to wearing size 14, I meant it. So, that was SO super discouraging. I know that I have baby weight (which doesn't feel any better than regular weight), and I know that Colton changed my body shape ... but size 14 is a no, no in my book. My hips, thighs, and gut/abs are so much bigger than they were a year ago, it sickens me. This setback teaches me one thing ... you are what you eat ... no matter what else is eating off of you. I won't do this when I have my next kid. Strict diet and exercise for me. Until I get this off, I'm going to have to put more effort into what I eat. I have been exercising like a fiend, but that hasn't been enough. And if I don't meet my goal weight for May ... I will start running everyday--not just MWF--and I will keep my other workouts each day to get a double dose. I'm serious here kids ... seeing that I was a size 14 was the worse possible thing that could've happened to me clothing wise, and I'm not about to accept it.

Stroller Blues

AH! I thought I had sold the jogging stroller that I bought ... no-go. The lady was smarter than I was. She saw that it is old ... rusted ... and broken. She didn't even want to pay me $50--only $20. I said that I would take it ... she even had $15 cash that I turned down. Come on lady ... I came down $30! But then ... she favored a swivel wheel--or she hated that it was old and broke .. and she left--me standing, watching her drive away, the stupid jogging stroller still in my hands. Grrrr! I need to sell this thing so badly! I guess today I will clean it up ... and if I get no bites in the next week, I'll post it again for $45.

late morning runs

So, it seems that I'm destined to be a late morning runner. I just can't get up earlier in the morning, so I go after Colton eats breakfast. It's starting to get really hot--even in the morning hours, so I wanted to get it out of the way early ... like 7:30/8:00. But this morning, Billy had an early meeting and left the house at 7:00 ... so I didn't get to it early again this morning. I'm going to throw off my schedule this week and run on Thursday and Friday. I really want to get in the habit of getting out there early 3 days a week. I will do it. Did my Jillian Michaels today. Felt good ... I'm really feeling it in the abs and muscles. I'm hoping to extend my endurance, as well.

Colton is fighting his morning nap. It's killing me! He better not be ready for one nap a day already!!! I'm hoping it's just the teething that's throwing him off. His morning nap was slim-to-none yesterday, too. :( Boo! I bought a bunch of veggies this morning to puree and freeze for Colton's meals--in a few months. I just need to buy ice cube trays. I'm glad I'm doing this ahead of time ... then I can get things as I go along and have everything ready for when he's ready to eat. Today, I bought: butternut squash, yellow squash, peas, green beans, sweet potatoes, spinach, carrots, pears, and apples. I will get plums, peaches, and bananas. I'll have to look to see what else he can eat and get those pureed, as well. I'm excited to have it all ready for when he's ready to start eating table food.

I guess it's time for Cole to have lunch, so I better be off.

Shredded

Got my Jillian Michaels 30-Day Shred video in the mail on Sabbath. I was very excited to start. I began it yesterday ... and it took me back. It's everything I remembered it to be. Oh, how I missed being shredded! Got my abs working, my cardio on, and my muscles toned. I'm doing it three days a week on the same days I am running, so I get some extra cardio in there. Today, I did my Wii Active ... I am currently hating the back lunges--mostly because I have no idea how to do them. Anyway, I am really going to try hard to get up at 7:30 tomorrow morning. I must go running before Billy leaves for work. I will do it. This time ... I will do it ... well, cross your fingers.

Colton is feeling better. His cold seems to be going away. I haven't heard a cough for a while, so that's a good sign. He is teething, though ... which makes him tend to push against napping.

Billy and I are going to work on the garden tonight ... if the rain holds off. I can't wait to get some veggies growing. We are planting: radishes, lettuce, chives, cucumbers, carrots, and green beans. We already planted tomatoes, and I planted a lot of those! We have cherry tomatoes and big tomatoes. I hope the big ones come in this year. The plants look good so far, so we'll see.

Well, must get dinner ready ... I'm out like the fat kid in dodge ball.

dreaded mornings

I try and try to get myself out of bed just 30 minutes earlier on MWF ... but to no avail. It is hard to get up early when you stay up late with your husband every night. I am going to try very hard to go to bed early on Tuesday night, so I can wake up earlier on Wednesday morning. I am desperately trying to run before Billy goes off to work in the mornings. So far ... hasn't happened yet ... Billy thinks I'm never going to do it--it doesn't help that I hate waking up, hate mornings, and always turn my alarm off before it ever goes off. I have a good feeling about Wednesday, though. I guess all I can do now is keep trying and hope that one of these days ... I will get up and go for it. Until then ... mid-morning run it is with my little guy in tow. Speaking of, I hear Cole telling me that he's ready for breakfast ... squealing with delight this Monday morning. :)

A New Week ... A New Idea

We've had a great weekend so far. Friday night, we just relaxed and spent time together. It was nice just to take a breather. Sabbath was good--great weather! We sat out on the porch and visited with Cherrie. I did eat some pizza last night which is totally against my new ways, but at least it was just one meal .... and luckily, I just ate a little bit. Hopefully that won't damage my plan too much. Today, I'd like to go to the farmer's market, but it looks like rain. This week I am changing my workout plan. So far, I have been running on MWF, and I do Wii Active on TTH. With a little pilates and jump roping thrown in there. This week, I am going to run and do the Jillian Michaels 30-day shred on MWF. Then I will do my Wii Active and pilates on TTH. I want to see if upping my cardio and core workouts/abs will improve my weight loss and muscle tone. I know 30-min shred works, and I have it on my Exercise On Demand channel ... but Billy is threatening to cancel our basic plus cable and turn it into basic cable ... wherein I will lose my Exercise on Demand Channel. One day this week ... possibly today, I will try Cardioke. Steph says is super fun, so we'll see how I like it. I am feeling better everyday, but I don't know if I've lost anything. I haven't weighed ... I'm doing that once a month. I hope that's a good plan. Maybe I should do it every other week. I just don't want that to become an obsession. It's really more about how I feel, how my clothes fit, and inches. My scale doesn't tell me BMI or muscle weight. So ... it can be discouraging. Colton is ready for breakfast ... he's calling, "MOMMY!"

ugh ...

It has officially been the worst week ever. It started with the worst day of my life ... after I tripped in the living room while holding my son ... and then watched in horror as he fell to the floor, we spent the next 23 hours in the hospital praying for him to be okay. God answers prayers, and he is doing just fine. But it was nothing I ever want to experience again. Needless to say ... working out has been at the bottom of my priorities. Tomorrow morning, it's back on like Donkey Kong. I'll get up early to go for a run before Billy heads off to work. My goal is to hit 2.2 again, but this time ... I hope it's easy, so Friday I can get up to 2.5 or 2.8 miles. During Cole's first nap, I will get my pilates done. I split some chocolate cheesecake with Billy tonight ... not my finest hour. I was supposed to only eat sweets for special occasions ... well, at least we split it. I don't foresee myself doing this again, but maybe I should come up with a plan if I'm faced with something delicious like that for a non-special occasion. Hmmm ... maybe I should just start screaming, "DANGER, DANGER, DANGER!" Cherrie comes this week. She is going to be here for a work conference, but I think it's really to see Colton. :) That's a good thing. Must get to bed early tonight ... 7:30 will come quickly.

A Beautiful Sabbath Day

I am off to see Steph and Andy today. I am so excited, because I haven't seen them in forever. Last night, Cole and I went on a walk after dinner. So, we can add that nice little jaunt to my exercise for the day. Today, we are eating at Tijuana Flats ... I am going to try to find something less fattening ... good luck, me. Anyway, it's been a good Sabbath so far. Colton woke up squealing and cooing. Suddenly, I heard angry screams ... I went into his room to find that he had pulled a blanket over his face, and apparently, couldn't remove it on his own. I took it off and got him out of bed. Poor guy ... he was so mad at that blanket! I put him in his gym to play this morning while I got ready to go on our little day trip ... after a while, I heard nothing--there was Cole, spread eagle, sleeping in the gym. Now, he is awake and has discovered the toys dangling above him are still there ... so he is playing again. I hope he sleeps the hour and a half down to see Steph and Andy. That way he will be refreshed to visit for a little while. Colton woke up with more of a cold today. He had a stuffy nose beginning on Wednesday ... and today he started coughing. Poor guy ... his first cold. I find him interesting to watch. He gets his arms swinging so hard and knocks all of his toys around so they crash into his face ... oh, the joy! He is almost rolling over ... he turns the upper half of his body on his side, but lo, his legs are so chunky ... he hasn't figured out how to swing them over yet. I am excited to run on Monday ... isn't that weird? Sounds like an oxymoron, but I am very excited to see if 2.2 miles will be easier. I hope so ... I'm kind of anxious to get to 3.2 miles. I don't know why--it's definitely NOT because I like doing it. :)

Better Late Than Never

Well ... I should've started this at 6 weeks out from having Colton. I could at least walk pretty well by then ... but I used my excuse of having a c-section and there I was 3 months out when I realized: the fat isn't going anywhere without some good old fashion hard work. So, starting at the beginning of March, I got back into my exercise mode that I was in a year ago, and I began to run again. Needless to say ... I still hate it. It's hard and every step I take, I think ... "let's walk now, let's walk now". But I persevere, because that's all I can do. I'd like to be 165 pounds by Christmas ... I am trying to reach 170 by my birthday ... October 10. This may sound too easy to some, but let's just remember that I haven't seen the 150's since I was in 9th grade. That's 1995 people! My one year from now goal is 155 pounds. That is doable, I think. The problem is that I have so many dresses, shorts, JEANS, etc. that I am dying to wear and that I can barely squeeze into ... if I'm even that lucky. I have to go to a family reunion at a lake--A LAKE--this summer where people wear bathing suits ... and I'm dreading it. Well, I'm at least working out now, so maybe I'll lose 10 pounds or so by summer. I am also measuring myself to see how many inches I lose. I have to make a change this month with what I eat. Breast feeding has made me hungry! Hungrier than I have ever been in my whole life. But that's just another excuse, and it's really up to me to control what I eat, how much I eat, and when I eat it. I can blame it on whatever I want, but truth be told, it's choice. Beginning today, I am choosing to eat only at meal-times with one exception (mid-afternoon I get extremely hungry, so I can have one healthy snack). I am choosing to eat smaller portions, better food, and save my sweets for special occasions--and that doesn't mean when I am bored and am thinking, "hmmm ... cookies sound yummy!" So, here are my specs as of April 8, 2010:

weight: 184.5

May 8 goal weight: 180

measurements:

hips-47 in.

bust-43 in.

underbust-37 in.

waist-34 in.

thighs-29 in.

biceps-13 in.

measurements goal: smaller

Today, I ran 2.2 miles. I started at the beginning of March running .7 miles. It was hard. Especially because I was pushing little Colton in his big stroller. I ran 3 times a week (MWF), and I did my Wii Active 2 times a week (TTH). When Debbie & Alan came in the middle of March, I ran without Colton and learned I could run 1.4 miles. Woo-hoo! Then Mom H came at the end of March, and I ran 1.8 miles. By the time Mom H left at the beginning of April, I had advanced to 2.2 miles. I am going to need to run this for the next couple of weeks before I advance to 2.5 or 2.8 miles. I need to be a little more comfortable at 2.2. May 8, I am running a 5K with Brenda ... 3.2 miles. I have one more mile to go before I will complete a 5K. I know I can do it. B wants me to run the Disney Princess Half Marathon with her next February. I'll be honest ... I don't want to do it. I don't like running. I don't want to run far. I run to lose weight, not for the pure enjoyment and thrill it gives me. I don't like running ... do you get the picture? I don't think I can run 13 miles. I'm serious. I'm a slow runner. Hmmmm .... I'll think about it, but I'm pretty sure my answer will be the same in 2011 as it is here in 2010 ... no.

I hear a little wail coming from Cole's room ... I best be off! Happy running ...